My story

I grew up in a small village in Transylvania (Romania) with my grandparents, surrounded by nature. My grandfather was a renowned carpenter. He did windows and doors and wine barrels. I had only one doll my entire childhood and only one teddy bear that I had to share with my 3 younger sisters. I always preferred to play with wood, hammers and nails. My grandfather was the greatest example of resilience I have ever seen. Even though he was born with tuberculosis, and doctors told him he would never live to be 30, he lived to be 91. He used to say “My dear, I didn’t have time to die, there were so many things I had to do!” From my grandfather I learned to always stay upright like a tree and to speak the truth. To have deep roots and to gaze at the stars.

For almost 20 years I was obsessed with the idea of saving others, especially those who cried louder, or who had more visible wounds than me. I graduated in psychology, did my internship in clinical psychology in Bucharest and completed a Master’s with Padua University (Italy), one of the most prestigious in Europe. But I kept being attracted by men who were emotionally unstable, violent, disrespectful, deeply depressed, deeply anxious, who ran from commitment, broke, with nothing to offer. Most of them did not request my help, and I think they did not want to be saved. But this wish of earning their love by doing everything for them was deeply engraved in my heart. So I became an expert on every imaginable kind of failure in romantic relationships.

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I am a licensed psychologist

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A different life can only happen to us by design

Healing is always an inside job. The same way we make sure we fix a broken arm, we should bandage our emotional wounds, and not allow them to overwhelm us with despair or depression. 
After repeated failures, I realized I was on the wrong path. The Red Cross Syndrome was my way of refusing to look inside my own wounds. I asked for help from a psychologist (relationship expert). To realize and accept my contribution to my disastrous relationships was the most difficult thing I have had to face so far. For years I lived in the past – obsessed with my suffering, family history, being “of help”, locked in emotional dependency and abandonment patterns. I had very poor boundaries and I wanted validation through the role of Saviour.  The deeper my inner journey went, the less I felt powerless and controlled by circumstances. Actually, I was the one who was not willing to make choices, so they were made for me by others.

To stop complaining about things I do not have or receive from others was and partially still is a big issue for me. The past is gone and no amount of pain or sorrow will ever change what’s there. But I do not want to live under the permanent vibration of loss and fear. I want to move with purpose.

Some of us live in the future. We plan a wonderful life for ourselves, but we fail to take action for what we desire. We are happy dreaming about it, it is all in our head. We are always worried about what might happen and we keep postponing our happiness. We believe we will only be able to be happy when… we have a million dollar house, a gorgeous girlfriend or boyfriend, a dream holiday. But when we get those things, we are still not happy.
A different life can only happen to us by design.

Consequently, I see this transformation I am able now to offer to my clients as an inner journey. Sometimes rough, sometimes straight, with obstacles and surprises. Only when we are willing to face our deepest fears can be truly begin to build the life we want.

The journey is more important than the destination. But at the end of this journey, you will feel powerful, in control, able to make choices for yourself and build a life according to those choices. I hope you will be able to see a life that is barely recognizable, like I did.

All my coaching sessions are available in English, Italian and Romanian.

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Our experiences are not written in stone; we are not condemned to relive them in a loop. They can be changed if we change our view of the world. We can learn what a healthy relationship looks like, if we never had one before.

My sessions are available in packages of 5 and 12 (see the Coaching Contract). The first session lasts 90 minutes, and all the others 60 minutes.

The results you can achieve are directly proportional to your level of self commitment, capacity for introspection and desire to change.